My bro's the fucking cutest, and that's why I had to steal his shirt.
The Pieces That Fall To Earth
Shauna sent this poem today. It's by our new poet laureate, Kay
Ryan.
The Pieces That Fall To Earth
One could
almost wish
they wouldn't;
they are so
far apart,
so random.
One cannot
wait, cannot
abandon waiting.
The three or
four occasions
of their landing
never fade.
Should there
be more, there
will never be
enough to make
a pattern
that can equal
the commanding
way they matter.
-kay ryan
Kay Ryan is also a bigtime D. See Ms. Cavanaugh's interview in the Blade: Ryan's hope:
California lesbian awarded the U.S.' poet laureateship.
Today I Had To Catch Up on TNG Stuff, Even Though I'm MegaFucking Moody:
"In a meeting."
When ambivalence is enough
Today's content provider is once again Dan W.
From: Dan W.
Subject: daring cat rescue
Hi Jenny,
I’ve wanted to send this photo to a blog. Your cat credentials check
out so here you go. First – let me make it clear – I’m
not a cat hater – some people think I am. I am ambivalent about cats
– which I think is fair since they are ambivalent about me and just
about everything else except for string and birds. Anyway – I guess
you could say I saved a cat’s life once and I’ve got photographic
proof.
I went outside to deliver some mail to my tenant in the guesthouse when
I saw something out of the corner of my eye. It was a cat, sitting on
top or the lanai (the screened-in area over the hot tub) with a Lays Potato
Chip Bag on its head. I took out a ladder to take a closer look. Every
30 seconds or so the cat would move it’s paw over the bag but it
was jammed on tight and the bag did not budge. There is no way to climb
on top of a lanai without killing yourself. Someone would have to climb
on the roof – reach over and pull the bag off. Long story short –
I’m afraid of heights – got the neighbor – got my camera
– cat was saved – I helped. Not sure how long the cat was up
there. I just did what I hope someone else would do if I ever got a Wise
Onion & Garlic potato chip bag, for instance, stuck on my head.
To Do:
- From ESG: "i am a dork but you are, too. thought you might be interested
in this
library of fabric swatches from the 1800s, all scanned and useable
for neat things. not sure what. maybe backgrounds or whatever. you can
zoom in and see the weaving and all."
If she is a down girl, she will eat DudeMeal.
The great Kentucky Neil scanned that Achewood out of GQ. What I
love is that Taco Bell would totally do that promotion.
So, here I still am in Vermont. A number of factors persuaded me to extend
my stay, not that you asked.
A Number Of Factors Leading Me To Extend My Stay In Vermont, Not That
You Asked:
- There are chickens here, and I enjoy stealing their eggs. At home we
don't have chickens, though Dave, Ed and I have discussed the possibility.
Unfortunately, DC
HAS BANNED LIVE CHICKENS. Only DEAD
CHICKENS are allowed. In case you don't have much chicken experience,
let me tell you: they are weird animals. When a mass of them are staring
at you with their beady black eyes, and clucking at you to feed them,
and pecking your shoes, it is a little scary. I have no interest in eating
such bizarre creations, but I'm definitely down with the eggs.
There
are some really good beers around here. We're not allowed to drink around
the retreaters, so enjoying a beer requires leaving the grounds, or employing
a mug. The other day at the farmers market I stopped by Sean Lawson's
table, where he was selling and sampling some of his Lawson's Finest Liquids.
I bought a couple Papelblondes and a tried the Weis-K, and Chez bought
the super hoppy Chinookered. Can you tell the guy's a Sox fan? Chez's
friend Jeremy blogged about Sean's operation here: The
Launch of VT's Newest Brewery.- Wednesday is the anniversary of my brother's death, and my mom says
(with her eyes rolling, I'm sure) that the "grief experts" recommend
you plan the day in advance, so it doesn't come along and bowl you over.
So, I've got some ashes here, and we'll probably have a campfire or something,
unless it's raining, and I'll try to figure out what to do....not that
it would be bad to back at home in DC, either. Because last year when
it happened Bob and I went back to my place and my housemates and Shauna
and Brian were all there, which was great of them, and I'll always remember
that. But anyway. I'll be here. I guess that's not a reason.
- The food here is awesome. It comes mostly from the gardens and nearby
farms, and Chez plans and chefs the meals, so it's all delicious. The
gardens and blueberries are going crazy and make more food than it seems
possible to pick, which makes me nuts, so one thing I'm going to help
with this week is picking blueberries, green beans and squash. Also, there's
a terrific pond for swimming, and it's full of critters, such as every
stage of "frog," and creepy flatworms, dragonflies, newts, and
so forth. Also in this miscellany category should go: lambs, walking into
town or riding in the dorky little electric car, doing some loosely-defined
yoga in the barn in the mornings, sleeping in the yurt with a thunderstorm
going on, the darkness and quiet at night, the stars, the amusing retreaters
(this week it's teachers, and teachers are funny), the cute little girls
who live here, hiking the trails and finding mushrooms, berries and creatures,
the river, the birds, and a whole lot of those sorts of things....
- ...but, yesterday at the store I picked up the New York Times and made
some time to sit and read the magazine and the sports page and start the
crossword and catch up with the larger world. My girl's going going going
all the time....she's kind of ADD + exercise addict, which is good for
me, because I like being more active, but it's also good to slow the hell
down sometimes, so I think we are helping each other to bring the level
of activity to more reasonable levels all around. I am inclined to relax
a bit too much, and she is disinclined to relaxing, or maybe just out
of practice....either way, it's fun to change and learn and stuff, and
that's more or less why I'm still up here. THE END.
Help Wanted
From: Brian
Subject: Help Wanted
dear all,
i need some musical assistance... the band i play with (formerly
meredith bragg and the terminals) is looking for someone to sing for
us, and we don't know anyone who fits what we're looking for
requirements: preferably a lady, someone who lives in or near dc,
likes sort-of-wussy music, playing another instrument would be nice,
someone who is in a band or has been in a band would be good, someone
who is cool and not unusually weird or crazy
if you can think of anyone who might be interested, let me know
love...
brian
--
I wanna know girls, but only love one
You are my source of energy
Hook a panel up to me
and shine down on me like the sun
Sister Mandy sends this, with the subject line "Blasphemy?"
Ode to Joy
From: Mom
Subject: STORY OF 2 HOUSES
hi honey...so,
is this true? I keep getting it from people....
it’s just that when I get stuff like that (which EVERYONE has been
told NOT to send me!) it aggravates me and I want to prove them wrong….my
stinkin republican friends! I went to snopes, but I’m so suspicious
I thought they probably doctored that too! Oh well…guess I’ll
just ignore it.
Love ya...zemom
I'm on vacation, so that's all I've got. Except your to do list.
To Do:
Helen's blueberries.
Nightswimming deserves a quiet night
Aside from the 9 hours I spent working, yesterday was pretty much a perfect
day. We got up at 5:30 and did some yoga-ing in the barn, and then it got
nice and hot out, which seems rare here, and at lunch we got to walk down
to town to buy some stuff, and after that I ate a whole quart of blueberries.
Last night was the final night of a retreat, which meant dinner was pizzas
baked in the pizza oven...so all the people were really happy, as even grownups
are when they get pizza. And then the retreaters had an amazingly lively
dance party for being booze-free, while we walked around the mountain some,
and took a night sauna, and then a dip in the pond under a very starry sky.
Sounds nice, huh?
Nightswimming 
, REM live in Jools Holland, Youtube.
There was even a double rainbow. Ridiculous.
To Do:
Chez and steak.
Meat
Look at these steaks we grilled. I mean, look at these Gaylord Farm top
sirloin steaks Chez grilled while I stood there in the rain offering useful
advice. She also made some sort of scrumptious bright red black raspberry
sauce, or something, but I'll leave that for her bloggin. Vermont is pretty,
green and cold. And my phone doesn't work so stop texting me.
Our dear friend Hanoi ESG was
stuck in Vietnam for several days, a victim of United Arilines' ineptitude
and Communist customer service. Her girlfriend made heroic efforts to spring
her, haranguing United until they finally agreed that perhaps they should
take some responsibilty for the fact that their fuckups had left a customer
stranded in the Hanoi airport. I'd be fine if the airlines just raised their
prices some and stopped being such stingy assholes about every little thing.
But that's just me. Before the badtimes, she sent this missive:
From: ESG
Subject: things i have seen on the backs of tiny scooters
driven by tiny women
box of live pigs
huge eviscerated hog, unboxed
big screen TV
stacks and stacks of eggs
baby in basket
several crates of ducklings
three goofy american girls
To Do:
From RT: "Two Guinea pigs wearing Peruvian local dresses are displayed during the Guinea pig food festival in Huacho, Peru, on Sunday. Guinea pigs are native to the high Andes and have been an important source of protein for millennia. Nowadays, in Peru, the animal is served with a generous portion of Andean tubers.
(July 20, 2008)"
Rodeo action © James Miller
The authority to guide the moral direction of our children
Up there is a picture my dad took.
Our old buddy Jeff Simmermon and his blog, And
I Am Not Lying, are famous. Espresso,
Extra Bitter: Man's Tiff With Barista Spills Onto Internet, wapost.
Jeff said his harrowing tale of espresso over ice had been picked up by
Digg, Reddit, BoingBoing, Metafilter, Consumerist, and DCist, all in the
same day. A toast to a blogger-in-arms, and the unpredictable fancies of
the reading public.
By the way, tonight: A House Party
to Support Basic Rights Montgomery, at The New Gay. DC's Bev
Stanton will be spinning in support of Montgomery County's new trans-protections,
under attack by those people
who try really hard to keep sex education out of schools. Did you know 1/3
of teenage girls get pregnant, by their liberal atheist homo-lovin' sex
ed teachers? True story.
Now I've got other fish to fry. Enjoy the day.
Suburban Marlyand crabfeast at CG's.
You can fool some of the people all of the time
(Before I start ranting, I'd like to point you in the direction of Part Impossible Dream, Part Internet Porn, Part Serving Dish, and Part Syringe: A Gay Baby Success Story, an interview with Bob, at The New Gay.)
It's not as though I've never been tricked by the internet. Snopes
exists for a reason. But I'm always surprised at how dumb
incapable people are of recognizing parody. All across the internets, day
after day, people willingly display their ignorance or humorlessness in
the comments sections of websites. From comments sections you'd conclude
the world is comprised of angry nitwits. Maybe it is. One of my favorite
examples is the letters section of Black
People Love Us (a quality racial parody site not to be confused with
the unquality Stuff White People
Like). And yesterday Wonkette mined the rich vein of stupid-right-wingers-comments
with the post McDonald's
Refuses To Hate Gay People! Man. That's good. As glad as I am that the
internet can be used by the barely literate, it worries me that there seem
to be so many of them. Rarely is the questioned asked: Is our children learning?
This seems like the time to talk about the New
Yorker Obama cover brouhaha, so let's just say, here are two different
takes by two different cartoonists:
1. 
2. 
I will wrap up today's snotty elitist post about idiot Greek choruses with the email from CG which
started it all.
Edward found this water tower in a tiny village of tiny
people.
Too busy eating blueberries
Today's first content provider is Dan from Florida, photographer, catsitter
and friend to lesbians.
Hi Jenny.
I’ve been enjoying your blog. Before I started reading it —
I had no idea what a lesbro was and now I know and now I know I may be one.
Today’s NYT’s Magazine has some good articles that may be of
some interest to your readers. I was hoping they would have included chef
caesare` in the article on Female
Farmers of the Northeast (sounds like a calendar they’d sell at
Borders) in the “The Way We Eat” section of the magazine. By the
way, if you were to create a Female Farmers of the Northeast calendar, I
would be interested in purchasing one – because I am from New Hampshire.
There is also a Q&A
with Patti Smith who I know is a fave of your sister Jesse’s.
She gets called out on her split ends – finally someone brave enough
to call her out on that.
The third part is on Pill-Popping
Pets. As tempted as I am – I decided not to use up any of my
own personal medication on Jesse’s cat Bob - who I’ve been assigned
to feed this weekend – G_d knows we would all benefit if I were to
drop a pill or two into her food dish.
Warm regards,
Dan
Today's second content provider is my old high school buddy Megan. She
is terrific.
Hey Jenny - I absolutely love this Carrie Brownstein blog on NPR.org where
she figures out which rock bands most closely represent the presidential
candidates, and thusly determines how they should pick their VPs (like opening
bands). There's also a nifty poll. I thought your readers would enjoy...
Politicans As Rock Stars
Hope you are well.
hugs,
Megan
Finally, Edward's brother, Parker's father, and my friend James sent a
book review.
hey
jenny
here is the cover for that children's book
called blueberries for sal
where apparently you play the character of sal
its about a little girl and a baby bear
who are too busy eating blueberries
to realize that they accidentally exchange moms
i think it is a cautionary tale about gluttony
and letting girls wear overalls
james
A piece of the Berlin wall from Mayda3000.
Prevent us from feeling our lives
Last night my friend Dave and I were talking about how the internet connects
us (if not deeply, at least broadly); about what it's like to see, for example,
Marisa, who I "met"
through this site, commenting on Dave's best friend Jimi's
blog, or to see my old friend Mart show up on my mom's
site, or my mom on my girl's
site, and so on and on and on. Obviously, the internet is fundamentally
a network (an interconnected system of nodes and ties), and therefore the
perfect tool for networking (the cultivation of alliances). You will not
find me saying a word against the internet. It lets me chat with my grandma.
It allowed Rebecca to purchase this
sweater for her dog. It covered the story of my
Nazi orgy with the Formula One boss (thanks, Bob). It gave me my job.
Most importantly (and rather miraculously), it brought me my aforementioned
love. But...
I get internet fatigue. It's too much, too fast, too all the time. I feel
like I never complete a thought, or have time to figure out what requires
more attention. My work requires that I'm on all day, so there's not much
I can do about it. I seem to long for quiet, empty Now space and
time....yet here I am at 9:15 at night...writing for, and about...the internet.
Which leads me to an essay I found today. I found it by way of a comment
left on the site where I moonlight.
The blog is called alight on
my web, by Mike Cifone, and the entry is titled dispersion
of thought. It's about mental space pollution and the "radical
avoidance of all things now, silent, personal, participating." Check
him out.
Another DC blog I stumbled upon is The
Flaming Rose by Greg Fletcher-Marzullo. His most recent post is Dancing
for Change, and it's about the documentary War Dance, which
follows a group of displaced Ugandan kids as they make their way to a national
music and dance competition. My mom and stepdad (since they are moving to
Uganda in September) have tried to get me to watch it, but I'm pretty careful
about what I watch, because I don't like getting angry. After reading Greg's
lovely post I thought maybe I could just get into the dancing....But then
Greg, who is a dancer and seems super nice, wrote me and said, "I'll
be perfectly frank, it's a rough movie to watch — one that required
a few pauses to breathe, but oh, the beauty of their dances are amazing,
especially what's so clearly behind them." I hope he doesn't mind me
quoting him.
More mental pollution/internet awesomeness:
And also what the internet's really really for, pictures of cats. From Annie
and her iPhone:
Aaron Pickering and Curtis Roberts of The Fabulous Johnson
Brothers at East Village, Columbus, OH. By Sean M. Goodman.
"Plug it up!"
My Columbus boys, The Fabulous Johnson Brothers, got theirselves a
fancy new Flash site. I loathe Flash, though I recently bought a learn-it
book, in an attempt to make myself less expendable to my workplace. But
who cares about that. Not even me. Go check the JBros new site for music
and cute pictures.
There
sure is a lot going on this week.
- Tonight at Be:XX: Maegan, Ebony and others spin at BeBar.
And trans girl takes Bebar's Be:XX to task for trans-exclusive marketing:
BE:X?,
The New Gay. And you thought a dance night flyer was a fun and simple
little thing.
- Thursday at Solly's: TNG
I Heart DC Party. "How do you feel about DC? Though a lot of
folks just view the city as a way station toward greater things, all of
its residents are here for a reason. Perhaps you're just around until
the session ends, or maybe you have The District's flag tattooed on your
neck. Either way, The New Gay invites you to come out and celebrate all
that you love about DC or to gripe about the things you don't. As usual,
our parties are co-ed and straight friendly. And in addition to our usual
mix of classic and contemporary indie favorites, we’ll include a
fun selection of DC-centric music."
-
Thursday
at a group house in Arlington: "An exclusive sneak peak at
Troll Tax featuring members of Mess Up the Mess, Partyline, and Hott
Beat. Pre-meditated supergroup or random street urchins thrown together
through chance? Come check out our tunes and decide for yourself!"
Also playing: Buildings (ex-Sentai) and High Castle (San Frandisco)
Kansas House
900 N. Kansas Street
Arlington, VA
Virginia Square Metro
9 pm $5 donation
- Thursday at State Theater: The great Joan
Armatrading plays a seated show. Tickets: one million dollars.
- Friday: My sister and friend Sharron come to town. Yay! I'm taking
them cat-trapping, crab-feasting, and to the Chris Pureka show, Sunday
night at the 9:30 Club.
In other news, I read a book: Annie Proulx's Close Range: Wyoming Stories, TNG.
Finally, Bob has sent an important message.
HE ARRIVED THIS MORNING, WE HAD
PRAYER, SPENT SOME TIME JUST TALKING, HE
HELD ME FOR AWHILE , AND THEN,
HE WAS ON HIS WAY TO YOUR PLACE.
When he gets to your PC, escort
him to the next stop. Please don't allow
Him to sleep on your PC. The message
he is carrying is very important
And needs to go round. May God
bless you as you do this - AMEN.
Walking for Jesus!
Say a prayer, then pass him on
to bless others. Our assignment is to love
And spread the gospel throughout
the world.
Have a blessed day and touch somebody's
life today!
I just did. He's walking around
the world - via e-mail!!
Pass it on , so he can get there.
When you forward, put where he
left in the subject box.
Minneapolis
Middle-Western City Slideshow
Coming this evening.
No time now.
To Do:
TONIGHT at 8: Celebrity Family Feud: The Office vs. American Gladiators vs. My Name is Earl.
Believe it.
Boston girls back at 1320. BTW, Petworth
4th of July kicks ass.
Dispatch from Germany
From: Brian
Subject: germans
i am sitting in an airport in germany
i am super-exhausted, because it is 3 am back home, but morning here
and i have not slept
i have, however, updated my blog
July 6: Bleary-Eyed in Frankfurt
love...
brian
--
Consider the similarities between fish and hit men. They are both
coldblooded. They have names like Hammerhead and Dead-Eye. They are
sociopaths with links to highly organized networks. They are incapable
of meaningful hugging. They are often killed in restaurants.
Summertime time time
Child, the living's easy. Fish are jumping, cotton's high,
and we've got Nadal taking the first two sets from Federer in the Wimbledon
final. We've got leftover dogs to eat and nine different mustards in the
fridge. And Ding Dong, Jesse Helms is dead. (Update: Nadal beats Federer
in one of the best finals evah! He deserved to win, if only because of Federer's
absurd cardigan.)
I'm too tired from patriotism to generate any original content of my own.
This site should be called Heck's Aggregator, or Heck's Kitchen Digest.
Actually, Kitchen Digest has a bit of a ring, and powerful built-in imagery.
I like it.
To Do:
- Homegrown
music lover Indiefolkforever is finally Back
in the Saddle
- Chef Chez and company dress as cows, accompany a cow, to 4th of July
parade in Warren, VT: Parades,
Pizza and Poultry
- YoBimbo's got some worthy
stuff
- Mom on the terribly cute Uganda Skateboard Union: Boda
Bodas, Bikes or Boards
- Someone named Tacim turned up to flatter me, so I went to check out
his/her site. I can't understand the words, but the music is sweet: 8/1
- taco/birthday cake live from
Hawaii
The Minneapolis kids dropped in, too.
