Is where I am. It's a quiet little place in southest Texas, tucked betwixt
a railroad and a highway. There are many dogs here. Actually, it's quiet
except for the trains and the dogs. Here's
a thing someone wrote about North Zulch. Tonight we're off to Tampa.
I'm in a small town in Oklahoma, and it's really lovely, and
small, and there is some serious weather in this state. The other night I got to see
a wall cloud, and
a lightning storm, and some satellites, and an orange moon, and a very low-flying, long-burning shooting star. When you've spent a decade with the uneventful DC night sky, that is some pretty impressive stuff. Then I lost my debit card, possibly
while lying in the road, or possibly while buying bourbon, my new good habit. I've also learned some new words here in Oklahoma, like "tornadic" and "sweathogs."
So I've been busy cooling my heels, and also working. Yesterday was that thing they call "Earth Day," and since I work at the behest of the Enivronmental Protection Agency, and since they have various promotions surrounding Earth Day, I've been doing a lot of pointing and clicking for work and neglecting both this internet concern AND The New Gay. Luckily, my special correspondents keep filing material. And, Coach wrote this super little entry on the racial politics of The L Word. Read it: The Way Who Lives?.
HK Arts & Crafts Klub
Personalized Lolcats
Anisha is catsitting Peanut Butter and (Orignal) Peanut Butter,
Sr. She says, "Unlike Planet Earth's nature photographers I did not have
to test the limits of my patience nor risk life and limb for these glimpses
into their lives and emotions. Lucky me. Happy Earth Day to you!"
Butter Beans
Jimi says, "i'm new to this bitstrip thing so that's the best i could do for dave. my phil collins is pretty spot on though i think."
The True Story of "In the Air Tonight."
Zombie Hands
Bova says, "I did this a week or two ago. forgot to send it to you."
Brian says, "Juno vs. Feminism. Please enjoy this review of
'juno' by aging anti-feminist phyllis schlafly: The
Movie "Juno" Explains Feminism.
she has drawn a number of weird
conclusions from the film
such as the fact that jason bateman's character is a victim
because his wife has "suddenly pushed him out of the loop of her
affection and attention"
she also lists a number of the failings of society as reflected in
the film,
in addition to the usual suspects, such as teenage sex and vulgarity,
she includes "unattractive clothes" and "uncombed hair"
these people vote
love...
brian
Erik says, "Who wants change?"
Wondering what people outside the US are thinking about the Democratic
primary race? Yes We Can International
H.Clin is on the attack, but with each day that passes in this primary
campaign, remember . . . we are one day closer to change. Yes We Can International
-E
Mash Movie - XXX -
We toured the Makers Mark and Heaven Hill distilleries in Kentucky. Click for some hot sour mash action.
ANNIE: "this might be too nonsensical for a general audience.
it's also based on a gchat. basically my interaction with college friends
these days revolves around talkin' yoga and playing 'guess who else transitioned.'"
BOB: "i sent that comic strip making thing to andy, because
he's marginally employed and loves shit like this. in his first creation,
andy recounts the story of a cyst on his nutsack a few years back. he
actually had it removed and saved it for me in a jar, but i'm afraid to
bring it through airport security and andy is similarly concerned about
sending it through the postal service. plus, we're both very snappy dressers.
the other thing to note is that we refer to one another as 'bag.' so,
'hey, bag' is like saying, 'good day, scrotum.'"
JAIME F: "Per your suggestion, I was bored at work today."
"Hello all. We now have an empty room to rent, and Chris will not be moving in until the first week of June. So we need to look for a subletter immediately. It's $150/week, utilities included. If someone is available for 4 or more weeks that would be best. They will have to share a bathroom with Cinthya, fyi. If you know of anyone who might be interested please contact them now, if we don't find anyone we will post it on craigslist this week. In the meantime, we have an empty room that anyone can use as a temporary opium den or whatever."
"Once you go into the compound, you don't ever leave it," Carolyn Jessop, a wife of the alleged leader of the Eldorado clan, told the Associated Press. Jessop, who took her eight children and left the group before it decamped for Texas, said the women were intentionally isolated from the outside world. "They have no concept of mainstream society, and their mothers were born into it and have no concept of mainstream culture," said Jessop, 40. "Their grandmothers were born into it."
The internet gives and gives...it only asks that someone bothers to notice.
Today that someone is Michael at The New Gay, who delivers us Lurid
Digs! That's some funny good stuff. Most definitely NSFW.
AND, this just in, Mess found a wonderful history of acid presented in perfect Chick Tract form: LSD History Comic. Awesome.
BJ FAN
Bova, Columbus: "This was being driven by
an old lady so I don't think this is her manhunt screen name..."
Marlz, San Francisco: "Good thing I didn't go to school here."
DC: Veatloaf by Chefz.
Silver Spring, MD: Bob wears Rebongaz.
DC, Larry's. Special: Mystery Beer and Margaret Cho
cake.
DC, Adam's Morgan. Good bourbon at Bourbon.
DC, Shellington: "Here's a picture of Flo licking
a bike."
DC: Watermelon house.
Jess, Florida: "Disturbing ashtray at Dino World."
Jess, Tampa: "Nathalia playing at New World."
"Burbs: Troy gets a pound from Parker at Easter Brunch.
Today's update is by Jimi. You might remember him from Jimi's Date with the Gay Guy. Please give him your attention.
From: Jimi
Subject: Fox News 2002
So I normally don't send an email to a bunch of people at once, but
this one warrants it. This is a real conversation I had this morning.
I promise all of these things are true. It has only been edited for
the sake of brevity, but I tried to stay as true as I could to what
she said, its almost verbatim. Again, this seriously just happened.
Setting the Record Straight.
A Conversation with a Coworker — April 4, 2008 8:42am
I generally start the day checking my 'sites.' I read the article
on the New York Times about how 81% of Americans are unhappy with the
direction the country is heading, as opposed to 23% five years ago.
So I'm discussing this with my cubical neighbor when another coworker,
we'll call her Tonya, decides to join in the conversation.
Let's talk about Tonya for a moment. The first day I came here she
trained me. I sat with her at her desk and watched her take a can of
spray cheese and dispense it on an entire box of crackers (Ritz, not
whiteys). She misses at least a day of work each week for the most amazing
things, my favorite of which is: my dog ate my other dog. Her husband's
favorite movies are all of those 'parody' movies (Scary movie 3, Meet
the Spartans, Super Hero movie, etc.). She loves telling you about her
bowel movements and other intensely personal things, including how she
won a blow job competition and had a threesome one time. Also, she has
a neck beard she plucks at during the day which must be made of magic
because it never goes away.
Anyway, here's the conversation between her and me:
"I think if Obama gets elected we're all going to be screwed."
"Why is that?"
"Because I think that once he gets into the White House his Muslim
side will really show and we'll all be f***ed"
"…he's not Muslim."
"Really? Are you sure? What is he then?"
"Christian, just like any other presidential candidate ever. You
have to be to get this far"
"oh, well ok then. Now I like him. He's got my vote"
(shocked) " …cool."
"I'll tell you what would fix everything though. We need
to just bomb the s*** out of Iraq, just blow them right off the f***ing
map"
". . . "
"Don't you think we should?"
"No."
"why not?"
"well, I can't get past the fact that they have never done anything
to us. Ever. In all of history, Iraq has never done anything to warrant
us doing harm to them. So no, I can't get behind killing everyone there."
(confused) "well, who flew the planes into the buildings?"
(pause to look into her eyes and make sure someone didn't put her up
to this to mess with me...No, she's 100% serious)
"…Al Qaeda. Who were comprised largely of Saudis, not Iraqis
and located primarily in Afghanistan"
"Really?!?" (pause) "Then why aren't we over there then?"
"We are."
(Like a dear in headlights) "Then how come we're in Iraq"
"Oil."
"Seriously? So there's no real reason that we are over there?"
"No. That's why so many Americans are upset"
"Well why don't they just bring our troops home?"
"Because we dismantled their system of government and fired all
the police…and we don't have all the oil yet."
"You are so smart! (said seriously, not sarcastically.) You are
like a set of encyclopedias."
"Thanks."
Annie says: "Oh no. Thank god I'm a vegetarian and I never have
to decide whether or not I'd like to eat a douche bag."
From: Debs "I walked past a Halal place and Brooklyn Heights on
Friday and was a little surprised to see that though the interior was
quite spartan, they had two skinned goats hanging from meat hooks."
From: Dan "Imagine...... for a second that you owned these sneakers. and then think about how different your life would have to be."
From: cg "I think you'll really enjoy this show, if you're not
too busy schtupping."
TUE - 4/01/2008 08:30 PM @ THE BLACK CAT
1811 14th St, NW, WASHINGTON DC, $8
The Feverfew (!!!!)
with Sleep Station & Anousheh Khallili.
Me: Here's a song for you: Mary Gauthier, I
Drink. And here's a video.
A shit ton of videos. Thanks Pete, Coach, Annie & Michael. Have a helluva weekend, kids.
PETE: "jenny, i just found the world's funniest youtube."
Pretty much everywhere, it's gonna be hot.
ANNIE: "this is pretty. i imagine a slow-mo montage of Bubbles
and Sherrod in the background. like the good old days--pushing around
a cart full of aluminum with a jig in their step."
i love that this uh huh her superfan is wearing a free city, aka leisha's
gfs co., hoodie for a lot of this: Uh Huh ... Her?
actually, there are so many uh huh her dyke fan vids
from sxsw, it's really hard to choose the best. there's this one has still
photos of them hangin with ms. carrie brownstein at the one:fifteen minute
mark; wtf am i chronicling this? kill me please. Uh Huh Her - Road Trip
oh wait, don't kill me, because clea duvall and leisha hailey like to
make internet movies together: It's Not Easy Being Green
It's been a while since we did our Dinosaur
Comics, which were pretty awesome. Now Miss Mess has gone and found
another major time-waster/creative thing to do: Bitstrips.
Make something funny (try to make it funny so I don't have to pretend
to lose it) and send it in. Thanks.
Mess made this one, based on a gchat she and I had once upon a time, wherein I tried to tell her science.
I tried to make Coach telling a joke by Miriam. Here is the result.
HK PSA: Pregnant? Scared? Need help? Or maybe you just need a place to live, now that your girlfriend's thrown you out, and then the building burned to the ground anyway. Look, I don't have time to hear all your problems. But perhaps you'd
like to try your luck here: $995 / 1br - English Basement, great location, awesome neighbors, clean. Kid-tested, Cats approved.
Suze says, "Thanks. For another T-shirt I couldn't resist purchasing!"
Yeah, get your "My Lover Cindy" shirt, before a woman scorned
sells you out to your worst enemy. Do
it, Dembo. Dembo also says, "Speaking of Lover Cindy: Stevie
Nicks: Stand Back
Mess says, this
video is amazing. please post on HK
for instant comedic effect. it's worth watching all the way through
- one of the women suffers from what i refer to as the marty mcfly effect
- she's wearing teal pants in front of a green screen and appears to
be transcending the space time continuum.
"I'm Dawn Denbo, and this is my lover Cindy." Be the first on your block to wear The L Word's catchphrase of the year. Exclusively at Heck's Souvenir Stand. Look, I even cut the sleeves off for you.
Sports
Erik says, "Who wants change?" 
. And here's a 
